My brackets:
On the democratic (questionable) side, Obama beats out Harper, who is a pansy, but loses to the steadfastness of Merkel, who wiped the floor with Sarkozy's indecisive reactionary derrière. Cameron distracts Berlusconi with an underage girl and takes on Gilliard, who barely edges out Zuma. Cameron's popularity can't beat Merkel's stubborn streak, however, and Merkel advances to the finals. DEUTSCHLAND.
Meanwhile, in Latin America, Calderon and Rousseff have a horribly long match, as Calderon is a fighter in name only and Rousseff is too new to play the field well. Still, with Lula's backing, Rousseff pushes ahead, but can't stand up to the crazy that is Kirchner, who moves on after screaming at Santos until he surrenders in order to preserve his sanity. Singh beats Lee by touting his nuclear arsenal (something of which Koreans, assuredly, are very afraid) and faces off against Rasmussen, who made quick work of Ban Ki-Moon's idealist arse. Still, Rasmussen is at the head of an outdated military alliance, and Singh moves forward with something bordering on progressivism (dare I say it?). With the resolve of someone who's too old to care, Singh lets Kirchner scream her heart out and then crushes her with his comparatively superb economic development.
Taking bets on the match between Singh and Merkel.
TO THE DICTATORS!
Qaddafi yawns when he sees that Saleh is his opponent and orders an airstrike. He moves on to meet King Abdullah, who won over Ahmadinejad in the popularity contest, and the combined general hatred every single sane human in the world bares towards Qaddafi and Abdullah's alliances, oil, and newfound interest in science lead the Saudi Arabian leader to victory. Abdullah faces off against Mugabe, who can outlast anyone and anything. It doesn't even matter who won the Mbasogo-Gbagbo match, because Mugabe beat him (but Mbasogo probably won; he has more than enough money to buy a bigger gun). Again, however, Mugabe is the strongest synonym of unpopular, and as in the battle with Qaddafi, reason beats out crazy.
Over in Russia, Putin made quick work of his lapdog Lukashenko. Kim Jong Il fell to Than Shwe due to his lack of true dictator-ness (the guy likes foreign films, ugly haircuts, and talking more than acting), but no one beats Putin at the art of staying in power legally and with legitimate popular support. In China, Hu's power and prowess can't stand up to Berdimuhamedov's ability to create an extremely repressive dictatorship and keep it off of the world stage; he faces off against the Castro brothers, who pissed on Chavez's inability to keep his country stable. The Castro brothers similarly piss on Berdimuhamedov, who can't match their longevity and certainly can't claim a decades-old embargo with the United States. Putin can't match their longevity either, but he does have a wiliness about him and inside knowledge about how to make a state democratic without really making it democratic. He's confusing and brilliant--and that's why he wins.
There is no need for bets on the match between Abdullah and Putin. Putin wins, hands down.
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